Today was the first day of my six-month challenge. It seems a bit weird, it feels like I’m embarking on an adventure that most think would be insane, but I know this is what I need to do for myself. I’m ready for this change and I think once I’m able to make the changes in my mind and body, I will be in such a better position to accomplish all the amazing goals I have set for myself personally and professionally.
The six-month challenge is a combination of a few things to hit a goal weight loss of 100 pounds in six months. The first 75 days will be doing the #75hard program starting 01 December (tomorrow) mostly because I couldn’t get my shit together.
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- Two 45-minute workouts (one of them being outside)
- Follow a diet (no cheating or alcohol)
- Drink one gallon of water
- Read 10 pages of non-fiction
- Take a progress picture every day
- NO FUCKING DISTRACTIONS!
I’m really nervous about this because 100 pounds is a need to lose 4 pounds a week to stay on track. I can do it though, I believe in myself. I can do this. I can do this.
I’m nervous to fail. I’m nervous to not hit my goal. I’m nervous that I’m going to be this fat girl forever and I do not want to be this person. I want to be someone who looks in the mirror and likes what she sees back. I want to be the woman who has confidence in what she wants, who she is, and how she comes off to the world. I am not that now. From May to November (now) I’ve lost 50 pounds and while I’m really proud of myself for making it that far, I still have another 100 to lose. So it makes the pride a bit short-lived.
I also am scared. I haven’t weighed my goal weight since college. That’s when I was 220 and lost 60 pounds taking me to 160. This experience shook me. When I lost 60 pounds, people paid attention to me. People who weren’t nice to me, all of a sudden were. Guys who would’ve never given me the time of day were all of a sudden talking to me. I didn’t know how to handle it. I got so mad because I felt like I was the same person inside, so why were people treating me differently?!
What I’ve learned is that even though you feel like the same person, you are in fact a VERY different person. Your body is different and your mind needs to be different. The time I lost the weight in college, my mind didn’t change with my weight. I think it was the fat me throwing a temper tantrum. This time I have got to understand that I am going to change. People are going to treat me differently. That’s okay, it has more to do with them than it does me.
