April 8, 2014

5 Reasons I Regret that Burrito

I didn’t have the chance to go to the store so I figured I would eat a burrito that would keep me full for the rest of the day. Let’s just say the side effects were not worth it. Here are lovely little signs I got from the universe that made me regret pounding that burrito.

  1. It made me full . . . uncomfortably full.
  2. It gave me indigestion, the kind that burns the back of the throat and makes you want to drink so much water to push all that acid back down my esophagus.
  3. I went to the gym and jumped on the treadmill I burped burrito for a half-hour straight.
  4. When I’m doing bench press in my frumpy workout clothes and this super hot girl comes in ripped to all hell in a sports bra and tiny spandex shorts. This girl didn’t just have a thigh gap it was like a thigh runway. I might have been a little jealous, and then burped more burrito.
  5. Bloat.

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